The Write Life
When so many things in daily life compete for top priority and I’m struggling to get through the days, my sit-down writing time may get squeezed out. But I still manage to work in note taking and writing via tapping thumbs and voice recordings from the kitchen, because writers gotta write. It’s how we’re wired. Even if much of that writing hasn’t yet evolved into polished or published pieces yet.
If I don’t write it down, it will spin in my head, taunting me and building up like constipation of the soul. Did I just relate writing to colon flow? I sure did; because if a writer doesn’t let the story out, that shit will make you physically ill as it festers inside you, manifesting as struggle to focus, anxiety, or a nagging ache inside. In that respect, there is a bit of a writer in everyone—a time when an experience or feeling must be released so they can heal and move forward in life. The difference is, that isn’t everyday life for most people…
If I don’t write it down, what starts as a sprouting awareness of an emotion won’t reveal its true colors and depth of concept that never would have blossomed without the first sentence that lead to the second, and the third, then fourth and so on—unearthing the root of the issue. People who verbally process the world around us need this outlet for sanity and survival.
I sometimes wonder if non-writers ever consider a writer’s life for what it really is. I bet some people think we just like to hear ourselves talk, or have some inflated sense of self that makes what we have to say more worthy than those around us.
But the reality is that many who are called to write do so because they must.
It’s not a decision I make or a hobby I enjoy, it’s something that happens to me, and my natural instinct is to let it out of my body via writing or speaking (IYKYK).
✍️ December posts in case you missed them
⏳ Annual Review ⌛️
While I tackled some of my hardest memoir writing in early 2024, it was so heavy I had a difficult time revisiting much of it for the rest of the year. I carried a lot of disappointment for that passing of time without more solid memoir progress until the annual Exhale Reflect and Reset event in January when creative women from all over the world gather to reflect on the year past and the year ahead.
It’s funny how a Zoom connection and a PDF with simple writing prompts can change the feel of my entire year, but it really did. I realized in lieu of my flopped writing goals that left me feeling deflated, so many other creative pursuits bloomed in their place that gave me life and connection with my girls. It was a reminder to move past the grief for all the things left undone, and instead celebrate the accomplishments that carried me through the year.
The following are some highlights from 2024.
📷 Photography
Self-Portrait Project
My Self-Portrait Project brought reflections inside and out. Besides getting more comfortable as the subject, I also really appreciate the documentation I’m creating of my life experience, which is easy to overlook when I am usually behind the camera. Looking at a photo of myself gives me more compassion for the struggles, and more gratitude for the successes. It’s been quite cathartic and a reminder that this isn’t just their childhood, it’s also my parenthood.
This project has really grown my confidence and comfortability with my own image and aging. I’m assessing new lines and shadows head on instead of in quick glances in the mirror while washing my hands… I would love to have something like this of my mom, aunts or grandmas. Maybe I will print the photos and their short stories/poems for my girls some day. While I’m not currently doing a weekly photo, I will still add to the collection over time.
Verily Photo Contest
I felt honored to be awarded first place in Verily Magazine’s spring 2024 photo contest with the theme “Adventure” for this photo.
Reel Memories
I started playing with Adobe Express to create “reel memories” of our outings and experiences. I’m enjoying this creative process while also giving more access to photos and videos that I capture instead of them just being stuck in my phone. The girls even like viewing our home videos during screen time.
🧶 Fiber Arts
The Wild Robot
We really enjoyed The Wild Robot series, especially Ava, so I got this grand idea to make a crochet Roz stuffy for her birthday. I found this Stitch Sister Co pattern to make a set of characters, story items and carry bag. The pattern was great and I was very excited to gift this adorable set. But the work itself was much more tedious work than relaxing… I don’t plan on more projects like this unless it’s something really special. I needed a good couple weeks off of crochet to recover after I finished! But the look on Ava’s face when she opened it was well worth it.
For the Love of Afghans
After a year spent working on Ava’s afghan, we have a relationship. Part of me was ready to move on and start a new afghan for Sophia. Part of me was sad to break ties from this thing I created that has become a source of stress relief and healing through more than a year’s worth of some pretty intense struggles that are woven into each row of fabric—a fabric that will now warm the little body that I am often stressing about. There are also rows full of joyful relaxing time in there. But I wasn’t prepared for the bitter-sweet feeling of giving it to someone else for their comfort and relaxation.
I hope it warms her in the winter and through illnesses as my old afghan (crocheted by my grandma) did when I was quite often home sick as a child. I pulled that afghan out of the closet when my babies were bedsharing because the holey fabric felt safer than thick comforters we used to use—I just never went back to comforters after babies. I found comfort in my afghan this past October when I was sicker than I can ever remember. With days and days of fever, I couldn’t bear to use any blankets except for my afghan, as ventilation in the stitching allowed me to cover while not overheating.
The weight of an afghan offers the feel and benefit of a lightly weighted blanket. Some patterns even include stitching in pony beads to add more intentional weight, but 22 skeins of yarn has a decent weight on its own. I think the comfort also comes from how the drape of crocheted fabric lays on your body unlike other types of blankets. It forms to your limbs, wrapping you in a hug. I like to layer a sheet, an afghan, a cotton quilt, and a golden retriever.
🎨 Art Therapy
Birth of the Dining Doodle
In an attempt to squeeze more creative moments into my day, I started keeping a mixed media pad, markers and pencils at my side on the dining room table. I begin with a loose scribble to form smaller drawing opportunities that feel less demanding than a whole blank sheet of paper. It’s bringing more light to the long, darkened days [#survivingwinter], and giving me moments of quiet focus during or after eating. I find myself looking forward to it and plan to hang on to this habit even when winter passes.
Art To Go
I found our summer so busy that I wasn’t getting much time to art, so one day I decided to bring it to our weekly homeschool gathering at a state park where we spend the day hiking, swimming, free playing, and connecting with other families. While I hoped it would help my girls connect with kids, I didn’t expect to personally feel so fulfilled by sharing creativity with our homeschool community. Even when my girls don’t join in, I enjoy the time and connection with other kids and parents, and delight in seeing them drawn to art.
🌈 Kid Creations🫶🏼
Our homeschool is rooted in arts and creativity (shocker, right?); random acts of art are always blooming! Keeping all the art supplies at the kids’ disposal makes for a hot mess, but cool creations. In addition to the endless paper crafting, cardboard building and painting, we grew into some new experiences this year that really expanded our creative outlets.
The Creative Bank | We put a lot of work into developing a family business, designing our logo and creating products for craft fairs, maker markets, kid entrepreneurship fairs, where the girls can sell their wares. We did two events in 2024 and hope to attend those and more this year.
🎼 Choir | Sophia joined a local county youth choir in the fall and enjoyed the experience so much! She was honored to sing the solo at their holiday performance—I’ve never seen her so lit up! That girl was singing and dancing on stage like no one was watching. She practiced and practiced for the solo, but there was one tricky note that was challenging to reach. I assured her, no one cares if the solo is perfect; getting up there and doing the thing is a success whether you hit that note or not. After getting past some intense pre-stage nerves, she declared it one of the best experiences of her life. The choir community was so uplifting and it was beautiful to witness one of Sophia’s core memories taking place.
What I learned about introversion from an 11-year-old: It’s not about being shy or lacking confidence. It’s about being selective with whom you spend your time and what activities you participate in. In the right place at the right time, there was nothing introverted about that girl on stage!
🐟 Fishkeeping | April started a new endeavor that I never imagined would become such a creative inspiration—enter fishkeeping! Sophia begged for a fish and spent months researching all things betta. And so began our first experience with a planted tank (live plants) and a half-moon twin tail, Romeo (named after one of her favorite Taylor Swift songs).
But even before the live plants and fish took up residence in our hearts, Sophia’s yearning for a betta had her crocheting little betta fish stuffies for herself and Ava. Once Sophia’s tank was set up in her bedroom, Ava decided to create a replica of all the equipment (with paper, cardboard, beads, shells, pipe-cleaners, etc.) using a plastic tote “tank” for her crocheted betta. Then came replica water test kits with tubes of colored water and the color-coded results chart. We saw countless drawings, paintings, and a larger crochet betta true to Romeo’s style and coloring. We added to the plantscape and learned how to create natural hides and tunnels for his tank with stones and driftwood. Who knew super-gluing plants to objects was a thing? Using a sketch book from Five Below, Sophia creates charts to track water tests and maintenance, and journals and draws about her fish-loving experience.
Romeo was with us a bit past six months and my husband didn’t want more fish after all the work and health issues we struggled to manage. I had to euthanize a fish. Sophia mourned a deep loss and journaled her way through it every night for a week—her Fish Shiva. It was a lot. I was on his side at first, but my husband has a history of shutting down after painful loses and I wanted to model better coping skills. And the girls were not letting this go... Sophia pleaded, “We’ve learned so much, it would be a waste of time and supplies and knowledge to quit now.” Touché. So, Christmas brought us a new betta, a second tank for two pea puffers, and an otocinclus in each tank. I have now fully embraced fishkeeping and love watching how living these experiences becomes fodder for their creativity. Plus, I can see the puffer tank while working at the kitchen counter, so that has added joy to my hours of daily fooding.
🕯️Winter Solstice | We carried on our winter solstice tradition of making beeswax candles and watching them burn after sundown. It’s a calm, meditative moment when we share our best and worst memories of the year. There is something about staring into the flames and watching the dripping wax while reminiscing that feels magical and connected.
What creative outlets lit you up last year?
What are you working on now?Share your projects and resources in the comments:
📚 Books inspiring and carrying me 📖
The Midwife of Auschwitz, by Anna Stuart
The Fatherless Daughter Project, by Denna Babul and Karin Luise
Trouble Me: A Small Town Workplace Romance, by Eliza Peake
The Dyslexic Advantage, by Brock L. Eide MD MA and Fernette F. Eide MD
🎧 Podcasts in the shower 🚿
(There were more showers than this, but these are notable episodes that had the most impact.)
1,000 Hours Outside with Ginny Yurich
Brave Writer with Julie Bogart and Melissa Wiley
#258: Turning Around a Day Gone Wrong | Shifting the energy with your kids.
PDF List of ideas discussed so you don’t have to take notes!
#259: The Power of Practice | What writing practice can look like for writers of all ages and stages.
#267 Natural Learning and the Brain | How brains perform learning and ideal conditions for optimal learning.
I love your crocheted Roz! I'm reading aloud The Wild Robot Protects with my kids right now and I've loved the whole series (and movie!) so much.
That ROZ!!! I would totally buy one from you if you ever decided to make another one! We’re just about done with The Wild Robot Protects and I have a feeling I’m going to miss these books.